Reminder: Disneyland is at 25% capacity, so Club 33 is temporarily Club 8¼ - Uncle Walt's Insider

Reminder: Disneyland is at 25% capacity, so Club 33 is temporarily Club 8¼

Temporary signage for Club 8¼. Photo by HarshLight [CC BY 2.0] via Flickr.

We were promised there wouldn’t be math in this job.

ANAHEIM, CA — While the Disneyland Resort and Viral Spa has reopened to the public (and, surprisingly, not in Texas), it is only allowing up to 25% of its normal capacity through the gates. Therefore:

  • Club 33 is now Club 8¼. Hopeful soon it can be Club 11 or Club 16½.
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  • You’re only allowed to have ¼ of the fun of a normal visit. Seriously, Gavin? No screaming on rides?
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  • Mickey balloons will only be inflated ¼ full.
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  • You can only occupy ¼ of a parking space. So either ride a bike or get a Mini Cooper.
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  • Churros reduced to ¼ size. Thankfully, Disney changed their minds on this, after threats of violence and riots.
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  • Breathable air onboard the Finding Nemo submarines is reduced by 75%.
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  • Park admission costs only ¼ of the usual daily rate. Ha! As if.
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  • Your author has learned the keyboard shortcut for typing “¼.”

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Be sure to check back with Uncle Walt’s Insider frequently. We’ll have all the latest news as soon as we find time to think it up.

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Cover photo: Temporary signage for Club 8¼. Photo by HarshLight [CC BY 2.0] via Flickr.