Resident historian Ub made his mark on the theme park industry by being the first to suggest that guests be charged money to enter the parks and enjoy the attractions. Sadly, his contribution did not result in personal enrichment, and he has been forced to lower his employment standards and come to work at Uncle Walt’s. As a veteran theme park insider, Ub’s contribution to this site is beyond description, and he is bribing us to keep it that way. Ub’s hobbies include cat massage, playing with big model trains, and starting arguments online with international soccer fans about American football being “real” football.

Pulitzer prizes are no strangers to Insider team member Harriet. She hasn’t actually won any, but she has heard of them. Fortunately for Insider readers, Harriet brings charisma, talent, and creativity into her writing. Fortunately for Uncle Walt’s Insider, Harriet brings cash and lots of it, otherwise we’d all have to sit at home just making stuff up instead of actually getting to go to the parks. Harriet enjoys ant farming, pickling foods that really don’t need to be pickled, and curling up with a warm book and an interesting cup of coffee. Harriet does not enjoy yachting, snorkling, or surfing, but does them anyway just to look cool and make the rest of us seem like slugs.

The mysterious “X” suddenly appeared at our office doors recently, offering his services to Uncle Walt’s Insider and claiming extreme inside knowledge of the entertainment industry. While we were perplexed, both by his unwillingness to give us his real name and by the fact that apparently we have an office, he did kind of resemble Bob Iger if you squint real hard, so we thought we’d give him a chance. When asked what information he would like in his official Uncle Walt’s bio, he mumbled something about having a “former career as a journeyman zamboni driver,” and then disappeared into the mist.